Do you remember....

.....the days when children made their own entertainment.  (Come to that, were you one such child?) They would take a simple piece of wood and imagine that it was a sailing ship. They used their creativity much more freely. These days, it seems that so many of the world's children just spend their time in front of screens, pushing buttons. They may be much more clever but they are missing out on a valuable experience.

 

There are times when we need to take a good, old-fashioned, 'childlike' approach to situations that seem to be very cut and dried. They can be if we can bring ourselves to believe they can be changed.

It is not only for what we do that we are held responsible, but also for what we do not do.  (Moliere)

Our passions are not....

....always appropriate. We pour our hearts into our preoccupations - our opinions, our beliefs, our passing fascinations. We get heated and excited about issues of intellect whilst remaining strangely ambivalent about genuine matters of the heart. We attribute the outcome of arguments with life or death significance. Drunk on the heavy liquor of a petty perspective, we alienate ourselves from the rest of the human race.

Keep the flame of your faith but don't use this to ignite an unnecessary fire of feud.

Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence and

face your future without fear.

They say....

....(Yep, I know, twice in a day. Aren't you lucky!)  They say  'Heaven helps those who help themselves'. But look how that phrase changes its meaning if you drop the 's' from the end of 'helps'. Greedy, assertive people seem to do well in this world. As we less ambitious mortals watch the likes of them climb the ladders of power and wealth, we can easily imagine that they are being granted a divine boon. We don't know, though, what their lives are actually like on the inside. Nor would we want to.

If you must push for something, do it for someone else's benefit.

To be good only to yourself is to be good for nothing.   (Voltaire)

They say....

....that if you can remember the 60s you were never really there.  In those days when I was a mere child, there was a pop group called The Beatles.  Have you heard of them? These are the words in one of their songs -   'Life is very short and there's no time for fussing and fighting...' and 'We can work it out,' they insisted. Could they? Could we?

Life is, indeed, too short for all that. On that, we agree. Somehow, though, this understanding doesn't entirely stop us from arguing. Petty conflicts linger longer than they ever should.

It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.   (Aristotle)

Some of us....

....have probably heard about a king in ancient Britain who sat on this throne by the sea and attempted to turn back the tide.  Canute was his name.  The thing is, he never seriously intended to turn back the tide. He went down to the water's edge in order to make a deliberate gesture to his troops and his advisers. 'Look,' he was saying. 'I may be of royal birth, blessed with a divine right to rule, but there are some forces that even I cannot command.' How very wise and how very brave.

If you acknowledge a weakness that you might prefer not to admit to, only  then you will start to develop a very real strength.

Do good by stealth, and blush to find it fame.    (Alexander Pope)

A hard heart....

....is a heavy heart. A closed mind is a mind no longer free to float on the ocean of possibility. Whilst there is always a danger that we can let ourselves drift too far or be receptive to those who might seek to take advantage of our generous spirit, we often do ourselves far more damage when we strive to protect ourselves.

It is one thing to draw a line and try never to cross it again. It is another to build a wall or create a defensive barrier that leaves you isolated and imprisoned.  Kindness is a key to comfort.

The more you care, the stronger you can be  (Jim Rohn)

Some people will say....

....or do almost anything if they think that it will gain them more money, more love or more respect. It's all rather sad, to say nothing of counterproductive. Money earned through insincere action is soon wasted on unnecessarily indulgence. Love attained through a false promise is soon lost. Recognition given to an empty gesture is rapidly replaced by criticism.

If there is ever pressure on you to lower a standard or to compromise an important principle, the apparent reward is probably not really worth having.

We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope.  (Martin Luther King)

You need wait no longer....

.....They say.........Right, happy now?  Then I'll begin - They say  'All's fair in love and war.' Is it? They also say 'business is business.' As if that is an acceptable excuse for behaving in atrociously selfish and ugly ways. Some even say, 'It is a dog-eat-dog world out there.' No it isn't. When do dogs eat dogs? 

The trouble with treating an extreme as if it were the norm is that it becomes a convenient excuse for doing and saying things that truly have little or no justification.

Politeness is the art of choosing among your thoughts.    (Madame de Stael)

Look at....

....  a flower or a tree. Look at a bird. Look at a mountain. Look at any example you choose to, but please look at nature. How beautiful it is, how magical, how breathtakingly intricate and how awe-inspiringly graceful. To be surrounded by it, is to be blessed.

Now, look at yourself. Who are you? What are you? You are a part of nature. You are every bit as magnificent and majestic as that flower, tree, bird or mountain.

Stand for something or you will fall for anything.
Today's mighty oak was yesterday's nut 

that held its ground.
(Rosa Parks)

Treasure your dreams....

....Be glad of your visions, your hopes and aspirations. Some will come true in the fullness of time. Others may not but that doesn't make them any the less important. Dreams are food for our hungry souls. We need the nutrition that only inspiration and imagination can supply. Of course, we also need love. There can often be love in our lives, even if it isn't quite taking the shape that we might wish it would.

Don't close your mind to your big ideas; let them bring you energy and motivation.

We often take for granted the very things that most deserve our gratitude. (Cynthia Ozick)

We are well aware....

....that children go through growth spurts. Sometimes, they can seemingly put on a few inches in just a few weeks. Adults, if they are lucky, don't increase their size. Or if they do, it happens horizontally rather than vertically. Still, though, no matter how old we are, we never lose the ability to increase our understanding. Ideas about life that once used to fit us perfectly become too tight and constraining.

We have to shed our old beliefs and opinions so that we gain greater insight.

When you say or do anything to please, get, keep, influence or control anyone or anything;

fear is the cause and pain is the result    (Byron Katie)

We can often be guilty....

....of making a shed load of assumptions and entertaining certain beliefs. Then, every so often, we discover we have been like photographers, glibly changing the lens through which we look at life. We keep a collection of filters and pull them out at will. We have glasses for bringing things into soft or sharp focus. Plus, of course, rose-tinted spectacles and magnifiers of varying intensity.

When one of these is in front of our eyes, we forget that there is any other way to see the world.

Clouds come floating into my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, 

but to add colour to my sunset sky.     (Rabindranath Tagore)

Do you fancy a history lesson?....

....You don't?  Well, sorry to disappoint.  Back in the 17th century Britain there was a Cavalier who was also a poet by the name of Richard Lovelace.  One of his more famous lines is - 'Stone walls do not a prison make, nor iron bars a cage.' Was he right? Well, those stones and bars can do a pretty good impression of a prison if you happen to be trapped inside them.

Still, though, such impediments are as nothing compared to the mental and emotional limitations that we impose upon ourselves from time to time.

Have a heart that never hardens, a temper that never tires, 

a touch that never hurts.  (Charles Dickens)

None of us....

....ever really knows quite how powerful a positive word can be. Or a generous gesture. Or an encouraging smile. When we offer them, it simply seems as if we are responding to a small, warm, impulse. We are unaware of how we might be changing the course of someone's future, altering their attitude, supplying just the strength they need to overcome adversity.

Perhaps some little moments of magic really are just little moments. But others have the potential to be enormous.

First principle: Never let one's self be beaten down by persons or events  (Marie Curie)

There's always a slight chance that....

.....I may be wrong, but I very much doubt if Beethoven got to the end of his Fifth Symphony and thought, 'Well, it's not perfect but I'm off to lunch so it will have to do.'   Likewise, I doubt that Michelangelo left David with a pair of dodgy knees because he had a pressing appointment with his chiropodist.

Give your best shot to any important challenge. Go the extra mile.

Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does. (William James)

The world tells us....

....all about what we are supposed to feel, how we are supposed to be... and what it wants us to want. It subjects us to a barrage of subtle - and not so subtle - persuasion. Adverts blare out at us. TV shows and movies beckon to us. People around us whisper in our ears or indicate, through their expressions, whether they approve of our behaviour.

In all this, it is hard to know who we truly are and what we genuinely require. Hard but not impossible.

The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.  

(Samuel Johnson)

We have to be truly vigilant....

.....because they lurk in every crack and crevice. They dwell in dark places and they wait until our backs are turned. Then, just when we don't expect it, they strike, speedily and mercilessly. What am I talking about? Doubts, of course! Fears. Concerns. Misgivings. Not the genuine, reasonable, uncertainties that we always identify when considering a fresh proposition.

I'm referring here to groundless, recurring, worries. Don't let them get to you.

Time lost is lost forever.

Weak people feel that....

....they must be rigid at all times. (Never a truer word spoken.....) Strong people can afford to bend a little. You can resolve to be weak, or you can decide to be strong. It doesn't much matter which position or which view you take, as long as you are consistent.

If you are going to do something, do it wholeheartedly. If you are not going to do anything, be proud, clear and firm about your decision to let things find their own level. Don't even think in terms of weakness and strength. Just think about what's needed.

Real generosity towards the future lies in giving all to the present.  (Albert Camus)

Good advice, don't you think?....

If you want to gain support....

....for a new movement, don't campaign in the graveyard. The dead have no political convictions.  (Parliamentarians are the obvious exception to that rule.)  Or maybe they do, but these are unlikely to have altered much since they were alive. And what do the living care about? Above all else, they care about being alive.

Too often we let issues irritate us. We become caught up in aggravating arguments. Petty passing matters detract from the fact that every moment is a gift. Prioritise the celebration of that.

Don't worry about what others think, This is YOUR life, live it the way you want to.

We love novelty....

.........yet we are very much creatures of habit. Innovation excites us, but we treasure tradition. We value independence yet we crave commitment. Still, if we were not all a mass of contradiction, life would be terribly dull. Does what you are doing now make a lot of sense? Well, whoever said that life was supposed to make sense?

Life must always have room for fun and spontaneity if it is to have meaning.

The merit of originality is not novelty; it is sincerity.   (Thomas Carlyle)

The things we do....

.... for love! We go to great lengths, we put ourselves in positions that we would never accept under normal circumstances. If we ever regret this for a moment, we open frightening floodgates. We allow a torrent of self-criticism to come rushing into our lives. We start to drown in a rising river of doubt.

You may or may not be willing to do more for love, but don't question what you have already done.

A good traveller has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving.  (Lao Tzu)

It is in the falling apart....

....that there is the most opportunity for a coming together. Where everything is cut and dried, there can be no room for manoeuvre. Where nothing is quite the way it was, everything has the potential to improve. If you are looking to solve a problem, think twice about seemingly sealed deals and non- negotiable arrangements. Times change. Rules can be rewritten.

What appears to be an impenetrable fortress may prove to be a cardboard cut-out ready to fall in the wind.

Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.  

(Marcus Aurelius)

What if something fails....

....to fall neatly into place? What if, in an attempt to clean up a mess, we end up making the situation even messier? What if we are all doomed and our lives are never going to get any easier? Once you start travelling down the road of pessimism, you soon discover that it is possible to go a mighty long way. Fears become self-perpetuating. Potential problems breed like microbes in a dish of warm jelly.

One bright, inspiring thought, though, can turn a dank dungeon into a palace.

Start by doing what's necessary; then do what's possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible. 

(St Francis of Assisi)

They say....

 .....'The best things in life are free.' Well, that's something 'they' have got right, isn't it?  Unfortunately, we rarely give those things the attention and appreciation they deserve. We focus on the things that cost money, the things we have to do to earn that money and the things we fear will happen if we don't learn to manage our financial affairs better.

All the time we're looking at the prices we have to pay, we have truly priceless gifts that are bestowed on us with supreme generosity.  Recognise the true value of what you've got.

God allows us to experience the low points of life in order to teach us lessons that 

we could learn in no other way   (C S Lewis)

Have you noticed....

....that box sitting untouched in the corner?  Well, don't open it - it belongs to Pandora and even she won't be silly enough to try to open it a second time.  'Don't frighten the horses. Don't set a cat amongst the pigeons. Play it safe. Keep it sweet. Get your head below the parapet and don't let your name end up on anyone's wanted list.' There! Sorted.  That's conventional wisdom for you, in a nutshell. It keeps a lot of people sat in chairs but does little to promote heroism.

The thing is, there are times when life requires each one of us to be 'heroic'.  

You were born because you are going to be important to someone.

Why limp through the door....

.... to the future, clutching a big bag of clothes that don't suit you, dragging behind you a cart of other people's problems that they have asked you to help carry? The door is only so wide. With all that baggage, you may not pass through.  You may have to wander round in a kind of eternal version of yesterday...

...until or unless you put down what you no longer need.

Make a commitment to be a master of change, rather than a victim of circumstances.     (Brian Tracy)

Greater inner understanding....

None of us can....

....turn back the clock. Why then, do we all spend so much time living in the past? We can't return to it. We can't even trust that our memory of it is accurate. We can't live in the here-and-now when we bind ourselves by our ties to the there-and-then. Yet still, we somehow find it easier to look back than to cast our thoughts too far forward.

Be motivated by what you can change, not frustrated by what you can't.

The words of the tongue should have three gatekeepers: 

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

 (Arabian Proverb)

Sometimes the smallest gesture....

 ....can have the most enormous implication. And sometimes? You can do everything within your power whilst apparently attaining no result. It's often the case that the most influential actions are the ones we considered to be trivial asides whilst we were engaged in the urgent pursuit of goals that seemed much more important. 

Don't just focus on what's ahead of you now; sharpen your peripheral vision. Be conscious, considerate and be sensitive, then so much else will change.

People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.      (Mark Twain)

Each and every time....

How many people are on this planet?....

.....Somewhere between 8 and 9 billion; depending what source you use.  Whatever the actuality, there are more than a shed full.  So how can they all be special? Then again, there are many more than six billion stars in the sky. Each of these is a sun, a centre of a solar system. A source of heat and light for all the planets in their orbit. We can't yet prove that those planets contain life, but nor can we rule this out. So how important are those stars to those life-forms? 

How important are you? How important are all the people in your world? You are an important person, leading an amazing life. Don't doubt yourself. 

Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced.    (Soren Kierkegaard)

Far be it for me to....

....leave you feeling deprived, so let's have a 'they say....' moment.

Don't push your luck. That's what they say. But are they are right? A gentle push can create momentum where none might otherwise have developed. It is possible to push your luck too far, but there is a greater risk in not pushing it far enough.

Ideally, though, you don't want to push your luck, you want to put yourself into a position in which your luck can push you. You want to be open, flexible and ready to roll with an opportunity if or when it arises.

Can anything be sadder than work left unfinished?  Yes; work never begun.  (Christina Rossetti)

Usually, when we lose interest....

....in a subject or a situation, it is not because we have learned all there is to learn about it. It is because we cannot see what else there is to be learned. That's a subtle but crucial distinction.

If we have real enthusiasm for something - or someone - we will plough past that point of inertia and then begin to make a whole series of fresh discoveries.

Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.  (Mahatma Gandhi)

You can run from here....

....to the end of the earth, but you can't escape your own shadow. If though, you face a strong source of light, you can fix it so that your shadow always falls behind you. That way you can be gloriously oblivious of your own dark side, whilst everyone else is all too keenly conscious of it.

It's far better to recognise the negative side of your personality, than to live in denial of its very existence. You have to own it before you can make amends for it.

The more we sweat in peace, the less we bleed in war    (Viaya Lakshmi Pandit)

Jack and Jill went up....

.....the hill, and Jill asked - 'Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?'  She didn't?  Oh well, it must have been Snow White's step-mum, then!!  (The memory ain't what it was.) Anyway, what a ridiculous question. No wonder the wicked witch was such a nasty piece of work. Even her own reflection had a poor opinion of her. Although... in a strange way... we all have bits of ourselves that we don't much like. Physical attributes that we might prefer to change. Attitudes we wish we could alter.

It's one thing to identify room for improvement and another to lose self-respect.

Being brilliant is no great feat if you respect nothing.  (Johann Wolfgang von Goethe)

A little kindness....

....goes a long way. But what about a lot of kindness? Well, there are two schools of thought. (Is anything ever straightforward...!!!)  Some say it doesn't get you anywhere. If you are too kind, they insist, it works against you. People take you for granted and treat your generosity as a weakness they can exploit. But being kind always gets you somewhere - and it is always somewhere worth getting.

 

Even if it just gets you right back where you started, that will only be because where you started from is the right place to return to!

We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can't just leave it in the cupboard and think it's going to get on by itself. You've got to keep watering it, to really look after it and nurture it.

They say....

.....That's right, 'they' are back - They say the truth hurts. This means that 'they' have given us another misleading statement; one that implies that dishonesty may be painless. Yet deception, as we all know, can be agonising when it is found out - and pretty stressful to keep up too. No process in this world, though, can stop life from having sharp edges from time to time.

  

It's just that the truth stings briefly when it cuts, before healing quickly and well; whereas falsehoods have little initial impact, but slowly turn to festering sores.

Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a constant attitude  (Martin Luther King)

It's perfectly possible to take....

....a secret with you to the grave. Sooner or later, though, perhaps long after you've gone, it will find its way to the light. Secrets are like pockets of air in the river of existence. They naturally have to find some way to reach the surface. As with information, so with emotion - but here the pressure to reveal is stronger.

We can't hide the way we really feel forever.

To love means loving the unlovable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. 
Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless.    (G.K.Chesterton)

A funny thing happens....

....to people who have realised that they love one another. They find their capacity to care is seemingly limitless. Even if, prior to this realisation, a person or situation hardly mattered, now things are different. Love and concern are not the only emotions that can be 'self-replenishing'.

Our reserves of compassion, patience, tolerance and kindness are inexhaustible if we only allow them to be.

Let us always meet each other with a smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.   (Mother Theresa)

Be yourself....

....It sounds like great advice. Wise. Incisive. Empowering. But in order to be who you really are, you first have to know who that is. The true fact of the matter is that none of us do. We have a rough idea. We cling pretty tightly to the sketchy self- image we have managed to develop.

Often, though, this only causes us to become more entrenched in opinions we ought to be growing out of.

An obstinate person doesn't hold opinions, but is held by them.  (Hugh Blair)

Poor and content is the rich....

....and rich enough; But riches fineless is as poor as winter To him that ever fears he shall be poor. The words come from Shakespeare's Othello, so I'm told. The message comes from long before good old Will was born... and will surely remain relevant for the rest of time.

 

It's not what we have that makes us happy. Nor is it what we don't have that makes us sad. What compromises our well-being is what we wish we had but cannot get or, worse, what we fear we may lose.

If I have enough money to eat I'm good.   (Shia LaBeouf)

Our world contains seemingly millions of....

....unwritten codes of behaviour that we transgress at our peril. (Ha! There are times when I feel as if I've grown old kicking out against most of them.) We are judged by our peers and found wanting if we fail to follow their protocols. Take, for example, the thorny issue of identity. Why are we all allowed only one each? Why can't we have several to pick and choose between according to our mood?

 

If you now don't feel what you used to feel, nor want what you used to want; in some circles, this is called inconsistency. A much better word would be progress.

An inconvenience is an adventure wrongly considered.  (G K Chesterton)